Exposed
by B.
Why is it that we need to share and connect so much with virtual people, or real people who are not in the room? So much so that we dismiss the presence of those who are.
Have not you noticed that you spend more time on your phone, starring at your agitated screens, checking your messages or writing some than actually talking to people, looking into people’s eyes?
We spend more time sharing pictures and commenting on what we do than spending those moments with those we cherish.
Why is it that I write more things about me online than I ever tell when I meet someone new? Of course my friends and family know all about what I share on my blog, but people I work with, or people I just met will not get to know that until months have gone by.
I am extremely open. I just need time to open up.
The danger of online blogging is that even if it takes me a month to warm up with this interface, when I do, I am nowhere near ready to sharing it with the number of people who will access it.
I know that. I am fully aware of it and yet I post. I share and I love doing it too. I love the immediacy, the receptive target audience, the feedback, the support, the exposure itself. I would not do it on just any platform, but there is something about this one that just speaks to me.
I feel that if I am surrounded by writers, there will be plenty of amazing souls who will enjoy my words, as much as I enjoy theirs. The thing is there are most probably some unavoidable creeps too, the ratio must average the one encountered in real life.
Why do I still post then? I post because I believe there are amazing people who will be delighted to get acquainted and I don’t want to miss out on that.
On the other side of our screens there are real people. Potential friends, maybe lovers too. I am not counting on that last on but who knows, right? We are in the 21st Century after all. Somehow, deep down, you and I feel that this is one of the new arenas. The new secret circle. The new Dead Poets’ Society. The new torrid way of exchanging secret messages and love letters. This is where some of the action happens. This is where we will connect, because, well, we share the same passion and this is so terribly thrilling, and comfortable.
Is it not too easy? Too comfy? Too homey? Do you not fear creating your safe place and getting buried in it? Is there not something missing in this world of virtual love, and likes and hugs and support and smack-less kisses?
As I am writing these lines my body is aching, is not yours? I miss the laughs, the company the challenge of a real life relationship.
I see people every day at work. I see my friends, my family. Regulars. But It don’t meet anybody new and if I do, it is fleeting and I don’t have time to react or explore. I don’t have time to tip toe my way around until I can feel safe and build up.
The only place I can react or explore is here. Online.
I get to admire, be fascinated, blown away, swept off my feet by words written by perfect strangers.
My imagination thrives while my body starves.
My brain is fed with virtual namesakes, but my senses are untrained and deserted from real action.
Do I need to disconnect to live again?
Will balance be sufficient to rise above the new challenges of addiction set ahead?
Will I ever sober up from virtual vapors and find my way through this labyrinth of interactive lines?
I would love to hear your opinion on this matter, so feel free to comment and start on any discussions my words would trigger in you.
Mug's Tale 
Interesting read, B. Lots of truths in your words, I think. My life is busy and I like having a world of WP friends who are available at the (often strange) hours I need friendship but also make no demands on the days I just want to hide away from the world for a bit…
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Thank you for reading and commenting Ryan. You make a very valid point here. Thank you for sharing your view, I share and understand it fully!
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It was just an extra-I like and agree with all you’ve said. I often wonder where we will be socially a few years down the track… Wonderful post, different than your 30something stuff but equally captivating 🙂
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Thank you so much! I am delighted you like it. I wonder about that too and I love exploring visions of possible futures by other writers and through my own imagination too. I find it very entertaining. Have you read “The Circle” by Dave Eggers?
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I am glad you appreciate my styles ^^ I write under the pen name Hailie Andersen too – I use it for fiction and fantasy. Those are longer pieces usually, short stories and hopefully soon enough I will graduate to full blown novels.
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I find blogging somewhat akin to ‘real life.’ I tread cautiously, not only with what I share in my posts but even more so with how and what I say in comments. It’s simply my nature in and with both venues especially when what gets written here earns permanence in our digital world. I love the give and take on WordPress as I find many bloggers to be of character and genuinely interested in what many of us choose to message.
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I understand your cautious attitude towards blogging. Written words tend to stay, even more so online, you are right indeed.
I am amazed by the solidarity and interest we all share. I find beauty in the energy we spend encouraging each other and providing reactions and feedback. I want to play a part in it. Thank you again for your comment. It is very much appreciated.
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You *are* playing a part in it. 🙂 Looking forward to more of your thoughts/words.
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Thank you for thinking so 🙂 I look forward to participating some more and exploring your work too.
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As someone who’s not that great with communicating in real life, I find solace in the virtual world of words. It’s a safe haven where I don’t need to filter my thoughts, I can be who I am without fear of judgment. And don’t we all seek acceptance – unabashed and unconditional? In a virtual world, that’s always a possibility. That said, I love my friends and family and no online community, howsoever diverse and comforting can take their place. But it feels great to have another world to escape to now and then when things get rough. I wish I could be more vocal for real, but that’s just not how I’m made. It’s a congenital dysconnect 😀 This was a wonderful piece and I’m in awe, you’ve unraveled so much with this post, I’ve got to learn so much about you (and your blogs and your work and there’s so much more to explore), I’m going to take a while to process so much beauty 🙂
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Thank you so much for reading, reacting and sharing your view.
I agree with you, our virtual selves are free of bounds and liberated from the judgement that could emanate from people who are close to us, who have this idea of us, and who would react upon our stepping out of that idea they have forged of us over time.
Online, people who don’t appreciate our thoughts just move on. Those who do, stop by and say “hi”. Links are easily forged and rewards seem high.
I appreciate the opportunity of meeting like minded people who share our love for the written art.
It is true this constitutes a great place to escape to now and then.
You sound very much connected to your loved ones. So am I. If we manage to find balance, then the danger residing in dys-connecting should be averted, don’t you think?
PS: I am thrilled you appreciate my words :). I will do my best to keep it up and not disappoint.
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Yes I agree a hundred per cent. Life is a balancing act! And I hope we manage to pull it off. I’m beginning to believe you can never disappoint, I’m in love with your thoughts. ❤️😊
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Aww ❤ you are adorable. You made me smile of a very wide smile ❤ Let me reciprocate the love unconditionally! I delight in reading everything you write too – dark or light.
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